C'Mon Man.

Team Stat Comparison

The Story of the Game	OKST	ISU
1st Downs	20	20
3rd down efficiency	3-12	4-20
4th down efficiency	0-1	1-1
Total Yards	420	346
Passing	78	192
Comp-Att	10-27	18-38
Yards per pass	2.9	5.1
Rushing	342	154
Rushing Attempts	47	48
Yards per rush	7.3	3.2
Penalties	7-41	10-72
Turnovers	1	3
Fumbles lost	0	2
Interceptions thrown	1	1
Possession	26:24	33:36

This is what pisses me off about the Cyclone Game Saturday.

1. It wasn't the Refs!  By the looks of the box score you would almost think that it was a close game.  At halftime the Cyclones led in every offensive category.   The penalties at halftime were OSU: 0 and ISU: 8 - 58.  Looks like the refs had a discussion at halftime and decided to try and even the penalties after they let a play go too far that knocked out our starting quarterback Sam Richardson. 

I've been to many games over the past twenty years and this is the first game where I heard the crowd clearly go after the refs.   So much so that after Richardson went down, OSU was called for two ticky tack fouls within the first two minutes of the second-half to try and make themselves look impartial.

2.  No it wasn't the kicking game that seems to haunt the Cyclones this time of year every year.   Particularly when they are playing out doors (which is every stadium in the Big XII), and when windy (also every stadium in the Big XII).  

Doh. 

3. It is the fact that we think we can spot every other team 21 points before we decide to play.   It makes it awfully difficult to win a game when you are playing from behind 21-0 after the first quarter.   The Cyclones have only scored more than 21 points twice this year.   30 against Texas and 35 against Texas Tech, both were losses. So as much as the other points bothered me.   Our run defense is as porous as a teenagers forehead.   Which is the kiss of any teenagers chance to score.    

It Could be worse 91-0.

91-0 Texas football blowout leads to bullying charge from a concerned parent

http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/highschool-prep-rally/91-0-texas-football-blowout-leads-bullying-charge-101510025.html

This is how they role in Texas.   Can I say that Baylor influenced this kind of blow out, no.   Do I think there needs to be a mercy rule in place for football (in general), no.   But, I think there is a thing that I was taught while playing football and it was called sportsmanship.   I was very disappointed with last weeks game.   So, much so that I couldn't even watch the second half.   When I saw the final score of the game the first thing that came to mind is: "I thought Baylor was a Christian School - nice example of running up the score."  Maybe it is because Baylor has been considered the doormat of the Big XII.  Baylor joined the Big XII in 1996 and through 2007, 11 Seasons the Baylor Bears had 11 wins in their football program.   So, maybe they were tired of getting pushed around, and since they've grown up they want a little revenge.   Art Briles and RGIII have changed that stature and program around at Baylor - they are big time, with a legitimate claim to BIG XII champ this year.   Yes Baylor has become a sexy program and they are making sure they are being noticed.   So, there is hope that our Iowa State program can be turned around.   My second thought after viewing the final: was we are nearly 3 weeks away from Basketball season.  

 Headline was: This is why we love Paul Rhoads.  This after the WIN/loss to Texas.

My what a difference a week can make.  How do you like me Now?  After a nice 71-7 loss to Baylor - these are the times that try true fans souls. (Terri from Ames: I know you are still hot for Paul Rhoads, put down that contraption.  I think he has already taken matters into his own hands.)  


I have one thing to say: We are going to lose this game and lose it big on Saturday against Oklahoma State.  And this is your pregame pep speech.  OSU has not forgotten how we ruined their National Title hopes with our huge upset in 2011.   I don't think it is going to be 71-7,  but make no mistake we will be out of this game by halftime. 

Obligatory Oklahoma State Hot Girl Picture 
You are Welcome Netten - Not the ISU Kicker. 

Last week Oklahoma State wide receiver Josh Stewart had 10 catches for 141 yards and had a 95-yard punt return for a touchdown, giving Oklahoma State enough offense to overcome four turnovers and a pair of missed field goals.  Stewart finished with 265 all-purpose yards, with 124 yards coming on punts to go along with his 141 yards receiving.  This guy reminds me of Tavon Austin  from West Virginia last year who tore us up.  Stewart will have another 200+ in multi purpose yards game.   TCU doubled and tripled Stewaret and still couldn't keep him down. The Iowa State secondary will not keep up, and we will get torched again.  

Saturday Sucks!   Sunday Sucks!   And the Fall Sucks!:   Iowa State has made Saturday into a garage day.   The Minnesota Vikings have turned Sunday into a Church and Family Day.   And the Fall has turned me back into a hunter, a baseball fan, and forward looking basketball fan.  I'm sad to say I'm looking forward to winter.   Or I could move to Missouri.  The Cardinals are in the World Series, the Missouri Tigers (Big XII defectors) are ranked 5th in the poles, and the Kansas City Chiefs are undefeated.   Come on Iowa State "Show Me" Something on Saturday.

Football Beauty Contest

Since when did football become a beauty contest.  It seems now a days.  Oregon, Baylor, Virginia Tech,  etc. are coming out with shiny this and camouflauge that.  When the heck did camouflauge become cool - Thanks a lot Douche (Duck) Dynasty.  

In the old days it used to be that Football teams like Penn State and Notre Dame wouldn't even put names on the back of their uniforms because the team was more important than and individual.  This message brought to you by "He Hate Me".  Call me old fashion, but If we are going to have a beauty pageant I want to see some good old fashioned swimsuit modeling, and when it comes to the talent show it doesn't matter what you say about world hunger or your stance on Ethiopian politics.   There is really only one talent that I care about and it won't be demonstrated on stage, or film unless you are Kim Karadashian.    

Mostly I would like to thank Nike and The Oregon Ducks.  The Oregon (Ducks) Douches have a new uniform for every game.  Kind of cool if you are an Oregon fan, but kind of annoying if you aren't.  Don't get me wrong I don't have anything against ducks (or deuches for the matter), it is one of my favorite hunting seasons. 

Iowa State Outlook for the week is: cloudy. 

Baylor Offense is Good: Baylor is the nation's most productive offense, with 715 total yards and 63 points a game. Scary good is the best way to put it.  Not," ah you got me Halloween scary", I mean like this could be a massive blowout scary.  Baylar is 1st in scoring offense at 63.4 ppg, a full touchdown ahead of Oregon.  4th in rushing offense at 299.6 ypg, 2nd in passing offense with 414.2 ypg, and 1st in total offense with 713.8 ypg, an 83 yard lead over Oregon.  Now the Bears are back at Floyd Casey Stadium, They have won 16 of their last 17 home games, and nine in a row overall.

Iowa State Offense is Better, But Not Good Enough:  Iowa State is scoring more than it has in Rhoads' first four seasons at 29 points a game, and is plus-six in turnover margin. But that isn't translating into wins. Nor does that allow you to be competitive in the offense laden Big XII.  The Cyclones' four losses are by a combined 22 points. Quarterback Sam B. Richardson is playing with a bum ankle. ''He hasn't been great and he certainly hasn't been bad,'' Rhoads said. ''Injuries are part of the game, and you deal with that. With that in mind, I think he's played good football for us.''  QB Sam Richardson is one key.   If he is healthy and can run, Iowa State will score points.   Aaron Wimberly is the other more important key.   He left last weeks game early.   The Baylor defense does allow teams to run, so if Wimberly can be healthy he could have another big game. 

Baylor Defense: Doesn't Matter.   Baylor offense will score at will.  If there is one positive for Iowa State when it comes to this match up it's the fact that Baylor ranks 61st nationally in rushing defense with 155 yards per game allowed on the ground.  

Iowa State Defense: Linebackers Jake Knott and A.J. Klein have moved on after being the heart of the Iowa State defense for several seasons. But the Cyclones still have the Big 12's top two tacklers. Linebacker Jeremiah George, whose 31 consecutive starts are the most on the team, and is the Big 12 leader with 10.2 tackles per game. Second in the league is ISU safety Jacques Washington with 10.0 per game. Central Michigan is the only other team with two players averaging at least 10 tackles.


Prediction:   This one isn't close - Baylor by a lot, unless Iowa State gets some turnovers.  This game has been the one that has been scaring me the most.   Iowa State won at home last year, I would expect the Bears to come out and put the pedal to the metal and I don't expect them to throttle back if they are way ahead.   If the Cyclones win, I'll be having AlcoHALL and Oates for breakfast. 

Your Fired !!!

This week the big news in college football was the firing of Lane Kiffin as Head Coach from the USC Trojans.  Kiffin was fired after starting the season 3-2 and losing 62-41 to Arizona State.  Arizona scored 28 points in the third quarter and that is when the decision to fire Kiffin was reported made.

The Rise and Fall of Kiffin in 11 steps:

http://www.sbnation.com/college-football/2013/9/30/4785034/lane-kiffin-fired-coaching-timeline-usc-tennessee-raiders

Why do I bring up Kiffin's ousting?   Well first it amuses me.  But secondly, Texas head coach Mack Brown could be facing the same potential outcome if Texas loses to Iowa State. If the Former Heisman trophy winner is calling for you head your days are likely numbered.

Heisman winner, ex-Texas Longhorn Earl Campbell: Fire Mack Brown

http://www.dallasnews.com/sports/college-sports/texas-longhorns/20130929-heisman-winner-ex-texas-longhorn-earl-campbell-fire-mack-brown.ece?nclick_check=1

Texas is currently 2-2.  Texas lost to BYU and 'Ole Miss.   After the 'Ole Miss loss Mack Brown fired his defensive coordinator.   You would assume that would set Texas back in the defensive department.  Then the Longhorns bounced back against the Kansas State Wildcats last week.

Lucky for Mack brown Texas had a few extra days to prepare for the Cyclones - they were on bye last week.   Let's hope for the Cyclones sake the Texas Longhorns have looked past the Cyclones toward the Red River Rival game next week against The Oklahoma Sooners.  Even with the turmoil in Austin the Longhorns look much better on paper and still have much deeper talent.   But, don't count the cyclones out just yet.

Sam Richardson had a great game against the Tulsa Golden Hurricane along with  Aaron Wimberley.  Quentin Bundrage was held in check by Tulsa.   But, Sam Richardson was able to spread the ball around.  Iowa State will need to continue to move the ball around the bong at a Grateful Dead concert.  

Big story of the week is the Texas quarterback by committee is final determined.   Case McCoy will get his second start this year.   David Ash has been suffering from concussion symptoms and won't be cleared to play on Thursday.  

"Hey John hit this ball out of my mouth."

I don't know if you saw this clip.   John Daly was drinking at a bar and decided to go out back and hit a golf ball out of a dudes mouth.   I can guess how this went, "hey John I know we've drinking all day,  maybe we could go out into the alley and I thought maybe you would like to hit a ball out of my mouth."

Bo Pelini Gives Dating Advice.

Last Week Deadspin released a tirade by Nebraska Head Football Coach Bo Pelini.  Here is a link to the clip. 

http://deadspin.com/bo-pelini-on-nebraska-fans-fuck-you-fans-fuck-all-o-1327398903
In honor of Bo Pelini's rant we caught up with the coach and he was kind enough to share some dating advice with our college readers.

Commissioner: "Coach, thanks for coming on the show."

Pelini: "Sure, Commish. Thanks for having me."

Commissioner: "So, Coach it looks like you have a few things on your mind."

Pelini: "Let me tell you one thing, Commish.   I'm just a little fed up with these immature college kids who just don't know how to handle themselves on a date these days."

Commissioner: "What do you do for your first date?"

Pelini: "I take her to a game."

Commissioner: "What if she doesn't want to go to a game?"

Pelini: "Expletive her!  It is far better to know up front if she is a Expletive Fair Weather Fan, before you spend a pile of Expletive money so she can feed her pie hole."

Commissioner: "What do you do on a second date?

Pelini: "Expletive her!"

Commissioner: "What if she doesn't want to go on a second date."

Pelini: "Expletive HER. You don't want to go out with me, then you can kiss my Expletive, you mother trucker."

Commissioner: "What do you do if you really need to knock her off her feet with your secret weapon."

Pelini: "I sweet talk her with my silver tongue."



Here are the things to watch in tomorrow night's upcoming game versus Tulsa.   Tulsa is a team the Cyclones played twice last year.   Iowa State won the first game, but got manhandled in the Liberty Bowl.   Neither team is the same team as last year.

The Golden  Hurricane are 1-2 while the Cyclones are 0-2.   The Golden Hurricane really have only one threat: Trey Watts.   Watts is both a threat on the rushing front and also a serious threat on special teams.   Even with the slashing of Watts, the Hurricane rank 92nd in their rushing attack.

Iowa State's rushing attack has been basically non-existent.   The Cyclone rushers rank 99th overall.   This could be attributed to QB Sam Richardson, who has been nursing a lingering ankle injury that he suffered during the week one loss to The University of Northern Iowa.  The Iowa State offense relies on having a mobile quarterback who can run, pass, and set up the run with the pass.  

I would expect a mediocre game between a couple of mediocre teams.   I expect Tulsa to pull a special teams unexpected touchdown.   But, keep an eye on Iowa State #9 Quenton Bundrage who had a breakout game of three touchdowns against the Iowa Hawkeyes.

I'd Rather __Blank__ than lose to the Iowa Hawkeyes.

I'd rather be forced to watch SEC games over and over without any alcoholic relief than ... Lose to the Iowa Hawkeyes.

I'd rather have someone blast the Alabama Fight outside my window on an unending loop than ... Lose to the Iowa Hawkeyes.

I'd rather have an ongoing and deeply extended conversation with a blonde than  ... Lose to the Iowa Hawkeyes.

I'd rather sleep naked on a hill of fire ants than  ...  Lose to the Iowa Hawkeyes.


I'd rather rather be known as the corn king than ... Lose to the Iowa Hawkeyes.

I'd rather brush my teeth with feminine anti-itch cream than ... Lose to the Iowa Hawkeyes.


If I were an Iowa Fan I'm sure I would blow .341 on a regular basis.  Of course if you stand outside the any bar in Iowa you could probably find at least 1 out of 2 that are above the legal limit.  They are Hawkeye fans.

I'd rather be: .341 BAC than an Iowa Hawkeye fan.: @Vodka_samm.














I'd rather grind my teeth on the edge of the pavement than be this guy: http://www.widerightnattylite.com/2013/9/12/4722042/the-ten-best-moments-from-the-hawkeye-house-story

Come on back now.